Too Soon for Toddler Tea Time?

Dear Ann Abler,

My baby drank Jenga, and he's okay.

Is there a reason I shouldn't be giving my toddler decaf, unsweetened ice tea? I'm obsessed and so she is too. I can't resist her sweet, lisp-y "I thirthty" whenever she sees it…should I try to resist?

What do you think?

Tea Time Troubles

Dear Triple T,

I believe the saying “resistance is futile” was first uttered during an encounter with a tantrum-throwing toddler. Google tells me it's from Star Trek, but there are certain things a mother just feels and I feel it was because of a toddler.

My favorite piece of parenting advice is when people tell you to “pick your battles” because it means you can do whatever you want. You can either pick the battle or not pick it, and you are following instructions. You win! So there you go, pick your battles.

If you’re unsatisfied with that answer and still unsure about the dietary needs of your little one, you can always be sensible and consult the American Academy of Pediatrics. However, I know you came to your Dear Ann Abler because you’re cool like that, and you know I won’t tell you anything you don’t want to hear. And, to be honest, I’m still not sure if the AAP was just joking when they suggested keeping toddlers away from the TV for their first two years. Has to be a joke, right?

Back to your question, and my answer - which has been brewed just for you: 

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes! 

Give your girl some sips of the stuff. Didn’t moms used to give their babies whiskey, for the love of Keith Richards? I hardly think a drink of decaf unsweetened iced tea will do her in, but again, in case it wasn’t clear, I am not a doctor. But I feel like one.

Of course there's a Ryan Gosling Kale meme (via http://eartheasy.tumblr.com)

If you have any lingering guilt about your decision, just put some kale in it. No one can argue with kale. Kale is invincible and is always right. If kale were a human, it would be Ryan Gosling. Say something bad about kale, and suffer the wrath of the vegan mafia. I’m not sure this is true, but I feel it is. 

Now go have some tea for two with your little cutie,

Your Ann Abler